Logan and I have been married for twelve and a half years
and have been together since high school.
Like most couples we have had our share of ups and downs, times of doubt
and absolute happiness. We have changed
in so many ways since the beginning but throughout these changes we have also
been able to support one another. When
people first meet us, they often see us as opposites. I am chatty, outgoing and always on the
go. Logan is quieter (until you get to know him), go with the flow and very content to just live
in the moment. How does it work??? Honestly, I am not sure that I know the answer to that but
I think at the core we have always had similar values, wants and needs. We both wanted a family, we love to be around
people we love, and we value spending time together and open
communication. We both enjoying being
outdoors, doing physical stuff and have complimentary parenting styles. When we decided to get married we had already
overcome some obstacles and we were aware and prepared to work on our relationship
when things were hard.
All of that being said one thing that has been extremely
helpful in continuing to have a relationship and identity as husband and wife
has been regular date nights. We attempt
to get out at least once a month. Our
dates vary from dinner, going to the theater (plays, not so much movies
anymore), walks, golfing (which I am terrible at but do it for Logan), snowboarding,
biking, etc. My parents live in the city
and are always willing to have the girls overnight J. They are the BEST!!! In fact, when we first become parents at 25
and were just starting out, my parents and sister, really encouraged us to continue
to take time together as a couple. This
was great advice and I am glad they did.
We are fairly involved parents and enjoy spending time with the girls,
but we have made a cognisant effort to not build our whole identity around
being mom or dad. As our girls get
older, they will want to spend more time with friends and eventually will leave
the nest (insert sad/sobbing face) and when this happens Logan and I want to still
have a relationship that makes us happy and fulfilled. Now, I know there are no guarantees in life
but date nights are just one way of making sure that we continue to connect and
grow as a couple. I’d love to hear what
other people do to stay connected and other date night ideas.
Saturday night we went to the Playing with Fire: The Theo Fleury
Story at our local theater. It was PHONOMENAL! Honestly, I was not sure about going to watch
this because it deals with some pretty sad and tragic events but I was
completely engaged for the full two hours.
If you don’t know the Theo Fleury story, the short version is that he
was a great but troubled hockey player.
He was sexually molested by this WHL coach, Graham James, as a teen and
also had a tough home life. He was
extremely determined and worked his way up to the NHL and was really talented
but drugs, alcohol, gambling and the trauma his suffered eventually caught up
to him. He ended up spiralling out of
control and losing his fortune and pushing his family away. When he was finally ready to turn his life
around he had to face all of his demons and pick himself up from there. I knew the bits and pieces of his life but
Logan and I were both so captivated by the play that we plan on reading his
book, Playing with Fire (check out the review from goodreads.com).